How Eric Garcetti Spanked the City of Los Angeles

Last updated on January 3, 2023

This Sunday, March 22, after almost 10 days of lockdown in Los Angeles, Mayor Eric Garcetti decided he had had enough of weekend fun. We had been constrained at home, without work, food, entertainment, sports, culture, libraries, etc etc. How come Gov Gavin Newsom got to order us around, and he couldn’t? Jelly. Plus, isn’t it nice to see your name in the paper?

Mayor Eric Garcetti Tweeted that we can’t go out to play in the parks

Original tweet from Eric Garcetti below. NOTE: this was on a very cloudy Sunday, that was pouring rain from 2 PM to midnight.

From @MayorOfLA: This weekend we saw images of too many people crowding our beaches and canyons beyond there capacity. Too many people, too close together, too often.

— City of Los Angeles (@LACity) March 23, 2020

What images? From where? Maybe he was sorting vintage postcards, and saw too many bathing beauties and volleyball games with people in them. Or did he get info from his spies at the beach, or lurking in the crevasses of canyons?

Which canyons, btw? Was he referring to Runyon Canyon, the only spot in West LA with no smog, where people can hike and get some exercise? I love the part about the “capacity” of California beaches. It’s the whole left side of the state.

Followed by his second tweet. My response is included: pardon my language.

Our Mayor, @MayorOfLA , believes that people in beaches and parks are spreading a virus. He is SICK. And once again, I blame Dr. Barbara Ferrer for all this shit and loss of constitutional rights. https://t.co/haD2JaDhGr

— Donna Barstow Cartoonist for LA Times & New Yorker (@TaylorEvictions) March 23, 2020

Daddy said we were being naughty, and that’s why we can’t have nice things – like beaches or parks.

Next, Garcetti’s followup tweet about the parks and beaches.

That is why today, in consultation with @lapublichealth, we went further, closing group sports in recreation and parks including golf courses.

— City of Los Angeles (@LACity) March 23, 2020

The tweets above were subsequently deleted, and this one was substituted:

This weekend we saw too many people packing beaches, trails and parks. So we are closing sports and recreation at @LACityParks and closing parking at city beaches. That doesn’t mean gather elsewhere. This is serious. Stay home and save lives.

— Mayor Eric Garcetti (@MayorOfLA) March 23, 2020

I was so shocked by these tweets that I went in the kitchen to get a snack, (of which I have hardly anything left, by the way, since stores are still picked through and I won’t stand in lines like the Depression.) But then it struck me: oh, that must have been a trol! My bad! No government official, let alone our Mayor, would actually believe someone could catch cooties in the windy parks or beach!

I went back to check the tweets. Nope, his official seal was there. He actually said that.

Disneyland is closed, but Mayor Garcetti remains stuck in Fantasyland.

It’s not enough that Garcetti allowed and approved  Gov. Gavin Newsom’s draconian lockdown, thereby agreeing that Los Angeles is no longer part of the USA, and should be locked down. And that it’s okay for Americans to lose their civil rights like working, travel, good health (exercise and Vitamin D.) How sad that he had to add outdoor spaces to the lockdowns, as if a virus is hiding in a tree, like a fairy.

Garcetti wanted a little star of his own. Some of us went out in the fresh air, after a severe loss of freedom, and this is our punishment: no more parks, no more golf (do they have golf courses in canyons?), no more anything.

Smack, smack, smack! This is why we’re not allowed to have nice things.

Garcetti forbids freedom and health

This doesn’t even touch on the real health problems in this country: 600,000 die of heart disease every year. As opposed to 7 deaths in LA  County that are related to coronavirus.

Exercise is a proven help for health heart and mental well-being, as the LA County Health Dept themselves have been advising for years. I mean, the price we are paying, sacrificing 330 million people to not be able to move or work, in incalculable to our physical and emotional health.

These links are from the LA County Health Dept, before they changed into demi-Gods, proving that they do understand good health – they just pretend they don’t:

• http://publichealth.lacounty.gov/mch/ReproductiveHealth/FAMILIA/ActiveLiving_Tips.htm
• http://publichealth.lacounty.gov/cardio/
• List of parks for health – now all CLOSED

Full disclosure: I don’t pay any attention to any of these ludicrous rules. I go outside, everywhere, all hours, either walking or running. It’s sad to see so many people locked up at home, when the air is so clean now! I ran into a bevy of police the other night – 4 of them, plus a squad car, near Franklin. We all said hello, and I walked on. No martial law…yet

Your prison bars are your own fears, ladies and germs of Los Angeles. Why are you obedient, like dogs, to these ludicrous rulings? Eric Garcetti is a joke, but you aren’t. Fear is the enemy.