You can’t know the excitement here about…a Freeway. The worst freeway. The one everyone hates to hate, the 405. The warnings started weeks ago, and lighted signs everywhere else let us know that even on the East side we’re not safe.

They’re closing the Freeway for July 16 and 17 for 10 miles – but they really start work at 7 PM on Friday night, so it’s 2 1/2 days. Just like the riots, they’re warning everyone not to go anywhere. I guess we’re allowed to walk, since they’re into fitness, however.

405 shut down cartoon, as a portent for the future rapture - or rupture

Not that they’re improving the freeway – they’re tearing down a bridge. Half a bridge. The other half comes down a year later, but they aren’t publicizing this part as much, because then everyone would know what an assy plan this is.

I know Rob Long, and he’s a funny and clever guy, but I don’t get his take on the freeway closure here. There’s nothing funny about it…it’s just true. The 405 is horribly unpredictable and terrible.

Cartoon caption: THE PROLOGUE TO THE RAPTURE: The 405 Freeway shuts down July 16 to 17.

Interpretation of cartoon: Well, it’s funny! I saw a postcard years ago of one of the original Rapture paintings, and never forgot it, with people flying out of car crashes, graves, etc, into the sky. I was truly shocked. (Although I’m easily shocked). Somehow that stuck in my head with cars being thrown off the Freeway. Both are sort of unlikely, but hey, one of them is happening this weekend.

Found a good source for all Rapture paintings, and you can see the one I was thinking of there. I give you this link with some reservation, however: the site is called something like Jesus needs new PR, but it is both un-Christian and unethical and BAD BLOGGING for him to use all those images and not link to anyone or mention the artist in any of them!! So there!!

This cartoon also runs in Daily News this weekend.

More cartoons:

1. Second Amendment cartoon on the 4th of July.
2. Am I mean?

Dario Castillejos cartoon on WikiLeaks

I was shocked this week, SHOCKED to have an editor at a major book publisher tell me that they don’t publish many books of political cartoons “because they’re too hard to understand, and people feel like their brains hurt.” As I’ve written before, I never read political cartoons myself until a couple of years ago, so I feel their pain, but still…a smart, sexy editor can’t understand a cartoon?!

I can’t explain her mental state, but one problem I had was that I just didn’t follow the news enough to understand the cartoons- and another problem was the cartoonists themselves – messy, scrawling, ink scratching, with symbols and name tags and not a bit of humor, either. But they’re online and colorful now, and if you think of political cartoons as little puzzles, or mind games, you’ll have ever so much more fun with them!

I’m starting this week’s roundup with a cartoon by Dario Castillejos, on WikiLeaks. I like a lot of the foreign cartoonists, for both style and concept – they usually don’t have much dialogue, so they really work on their drawings! Uncle Sam is a rather tired symbol – I’ve never used it, nor been tempted to, in 2 years of doing cartoons – but this drawing of Uncle Sam as a scarecrow is pretty amusing! Oh, look, Mr. Crow has torn out his eye. Gulp. I like this grisly approach, maybe because it reminds me of Scarecrows, a truly scary good movie that I recommend.

Also, I might have missed an ingredient here. Does taking an eye out mean something different in Latin America, where the cartoonist is from? That’s for scholars to figure out.

I don’t think WikiLeaks is very interesting or exciting so far- what was it this time, name-calling? – so this cartoon is a little overdramatic, but it would liven up your paper, wouldn’t it? Thanks, Dario.

I’m not a fan of animation. But sometimes I have dreams where I’m looking at a single panel cartoon and it starts to move. I’m including this cartoon by David Fitzsimmons because he has some interesting movement going on here, and because how can we ever say thank you enough to our military men and women?

david fitzsimmons on veterans day

David has a loose cartoon-y style, but that only emphasizes the straight-backed dignity of this soldier as he goes on his way. Cartoonists never cry, but I may have gotten something in my eye for a moment…

Arcadio Esquivel cartoon on Pope and condoms

Last we have Arcadio Esquivel and a really great cartoon on the Pope and his take on condoms! I laugh every time I look at this! I want to do a cartoon on this subject, too, but Arcadio might have won this game. This cartoon has movement in it, too – the way he keeps jiggling the condom on a stick, and his rather devilish expression – divine!

This cartoon has what is called a limited palette – only 2 colors, instead of the rich reds, etc, others might use on the Catholic Church leader’s vestments. It works.

Come back tomorrow for Part 2!

A big thanks to Cagle Cartoons.com for permission to use these cartoons (except for mine below, which are ALL MINE. :).) If you want to submit your own cartoons for consideration here, feel free to email me here. (JPGs under 200 kb, and only one per week, please!)

My own cartoon this week of gays in the military can be found on Yahoo News (Sorry, no link now. Uclick Gocomics threw away 2 years of my cartoons on Slate, Gocomics and Yahoo News when they kicked me out.), and comments are on GoComics.

don't ask don't tell cartoon

This cartoon on Meg Whitman (no link now) is a teeny bit mean.

meg whitman lost cartoon

My cartoon on the TSA (no link now) and airport irritations.

thanksgiving day with the tsa cartoon

More cartoons:

1. Editorial cartoons for LA Times, April 2010.
2. Political oil, immigration, Facebook cartoons for the LA Times for May 2, 2010.

cartoon on building mosque near 9/11 Twin Towers

Interesting story of man who burned the Koran on 9-11 and then was FIRED from his job at the NJ Transit Authority. From NY Daily News:

Derek Fenton, 39, of Bloomingdale, N.J., burned the book during a protest on the ninth anniversary of Sept. 11 outside Park51, the controversial mosque slated to be built near Ground Zero.

“Mr. Fenton’s public actions violated New Jersey Transit’s code of ethics,” an agency statement said.

“NJ Transit concluded that Mr. Fenton violated his trust as a state employee and therefore [he] was dismissed.”

“He said, ‘This is America,’ and he wanted to stand up for it, in a Tea Party kind of way,” a police source said.

Another police source said Fenton described himself as a “loyal American” exercising his “right to protest.”
If Fenton was fired for burning the Koran while off-duty, his First Amendment rights probably were violated, Chris Dunn of the New York Civil Liberties Union said.

I would think so! The guy is doing this on his own time, and certainly not representing NJTransit! I don’t believe any book should be burned, let alone religious books. But a book isn’t as bad as a flag, and he did have a right to his beliefs.

Myself, I did some research on the poor souls who were forced to jump from the Twin Towers on Saturday September 11, 2010. Very interesting, and I may post it here. It was the most horrifying part of the event to me, and perhaps to others.

And I think even Obama realizes now that he may have put a big schism in the Democratic party for voters, for him to act like this is no big deal. Freedom of religion, yes. But it’s not like everyone can just build wherever they want to anyway. Zoning, neighborhoods, height, number of similar businesses, traffic congestion – these all regulate where building is allowed.

And so should a major event in our history.

And I was really pissed off when someone on Facebook wrote this on someone’s page:

Yes, while I honor those who died, I never cease to flinch at the hyperbole about freedom surrounding 9/11 when it seems to me that since 2001 we have played into the terrorists’ hands by ultimately forgetting some of our core-values—-like freedome of religion. And don’t get me started on the “marketing” of 9/11.

This started a long discussion of me disagreeing with all the other libs there who seem to think 9-11 was just a dream or a movie or a fantasy. It’s almost as if…and feel free to correct me here…they’re jealous that conservatives can point to an actual event that happened. As if this is a PARTISAN issue, instead of history! Amazing.

There are probably many more comments on this cartoon on Gocomics, (Sorry, no link now. Uclick threw away 2 years of my cartoons on Slate, Gocomics and Yahoo News when they kicked me out of Gocomics.) and I made a few minor changes in the drawing there.

For search engines: GROUND ZERO and GROUND HALF A BRAIN. Ground Zero is the Twin Towers and Ground Half a Brain is the White House. (meaning Obama.)

More cartoons:

1. 9/11 Cartoon in 2009.
2. The cop who ordered green ice cream.

(Animation is included in the Academy Awards because it is a movie. It’s not in print anywhere, because it’s a movie. It has pages of dialogue, sound, music, voices, and much movie software because it’s a movie. It’s only in a handful of venues online because it uses up a hella lot of bandwidth, since it’s a movie.)

It looks like the Pulitzer judges can no longer be trusted to judge cartoons. I’m going to look into this further, and if this is the case, I’ll do my own judging for the Pulitzers next year, thanks.

Back to this week’s REAL cartoons that I think are best for the Los Angeles Times!

dan wasserman of gocomics.com on Goldman Sachs

Dan Wasserman of Gocomics has a sly sense of humor! I liked one of his for last week’s roundup, too. Of course, he could have included a woman in the lineup, but that would just be icing on the cake. I am so ticked off at Goldman Sachs I could scream, as my grandmother would say. Humor is just a way of quieting the rage, while still drawing an excellent picture of how Goldman Sachs screwed the public. Again.

Arcadio Esquivel of Caglecartoons.com on priest molestation

Here’s a great wordless cartoon by Arcadio Esquivel, of Mexico, I think, from Cagle Cartoons. Look at how the olive green and muted red bounce off each other! The cell phones look kind of dated…from 5 years ago? I wonder if priests really wear lemon colored tunics in other countries… No matter. Great illustration and comment. Since whites are now a minority in LA, I imagine Catholicism is the biggest religion, though I’m too lazy to look it up. Even so, the LA Times hates skeevy and anything too controversial, even when the whole subject is vulgar and disgusting, so they’ll love this one. :)

signe wilkinson of gocomics.com on high cost of education

Signe Wilkinson of Gocomics.com is one of my top 3 favorite cartoonists. The drawing is spot on, and love the colors. I saw several cartoons by other guys, while researching for this post, that used the Iceland volcanic ash to illustrate ideas like the economy, Goldman Sachs, war, etc. All viable. I think comparing it to the high cost of college is a bit of a stretch, but I’m not a parent, so maybe this is the time of year when tuition bills come due.

Also, I wanted to include this because education topics bore me, in general, but I’m trying to be more well-rounded, since this is for the TIMES.

Last, for Honorable Mention:

pat oliphant of gocomics.com on banana republic, the store

Okay, full disclosure: I can’t stand Oliphant. I think it’s okay to say it here, because he’s so popular nothing I say will make a difference, or hurt him, and I doubt he’s online much, if ever, so there you go.

He’s #3 in popularity in Gomics. And when I started there, for Slate, even one of the editors (not mine) said that Oliphant was his favorite! Uh-oh, I thought. He couldn’t be farther from what I wanted to do if he tried.

However, this particular cartoon caught my casual attention twice during the week, and since I may not like another of his cartoons for months, and the LA Times deserves the best cartoonists – and he did win a Pulitzer – back when it meant something, and didn’t include animation desperation- I want to include it here. I really like the jungle drawing, and the title at the bottom. Now, Banana Republic is one of my favorite stores, so I thought he meant two naked people wanted to go to Banana Republic to get new clothes. (It’s good to be a girl.) Twice I thought this, and wondered if the store was using illegal labor or something, which they are pretty clear about NOT doing.

But examining it more closely today, I think it is something about a banana republic, the political term. I haven’t heard that expression for a while and don’t have time to look it up on Wiki. She’s handing Adam a banana. I can see that. If you squint you can see one of those really annoying PSs he does that I never bother to read- it says they taste like apples.

I have no idea what this cartoon means. But here’s your Pat Oliphant cartoon, LA Times.

My own cartoons this week:

tax revenue cartoon in California

Comments on schools in California. (Sorry, no link now. Uclick threw away 2 years of my cartoons on Slate, Gocomics and Yahoo News when they kicked me out of Gocomics.)

Gizmodo and iphone cartoon

Comments on Gizmodo and stolen iPhone. (Front page of Slate all weekend!) (Sorry, no link now.)

Obama as cheapskate for forest land

Comments on Obama as cheapskate for wild lands (Sorry, no link now.)(which appears in the Sunday LA Daily News (rival of LA Times) today because they have a great editor there! :))

An explanation of why I’m doing this collection each week, and how you can submit your own cartoon, is here.

Captions spelled out for Google: Kaboom. I hate opening the college tuition bill. Child confesses to priest from across the room. Thank you for trading with us! Have a cigar! Congratulations! Cigar? Congratulations! Goldman Sachs. Adam and Eve in the Banana Republic. What you got there, Eve? Beats me – here, try one. Label says “Made in China.” They taste like apples. Nation lagging, recession continues, etc.

What do you think of this collection? Were these the best cartoons you found this week?

More cartoons:

1. Political cartoons for the LA Times for May 10, 2010.
2. Political oil, immigration, Facebook cartoons for the LA Times for May 2, 2010.

I had to wade through a lot of elephants saying no to Obama (for Supreme Court nominees), and a lot of  Tea Party ridiculers, and of course Sarah Palin haters, before I found these gems. (I think Glenn McCoy and I may be the only cartoonists who even attempt to shed light on the liberal wussy left.)

I’ll start off today with a cartoonist who is firmly conservative, however: Lisa Benson from Gocomics.com.

Lisa Benson of Gocomics

Lisa is very local – lives somewhat to the North of LA, and is the cartoonist for a California paper. She usually attacks Obama, rather than political issues in general, as is true in this cartoon. For instance, one (like me) might target the evil bombing countries, but she prefers to blame the President! I picked this cartoon because the Nuclear Summit was in the news this week, and Obama’s facial expression and casual whistle as he walks away made me smile!

I guess I’m not always the best critic, because at first I thought she was saying Obama did a good job! But since the bomb is National Security, I guess not. Still, good cartoon (even though I don’t agree with the point of view) and she draws a credible Obama. Some other cartoonists might want to practice him, since he’ll be around for a while. :)

Mike Luckovich of Gocomics.com

I picked almost all captionless cartoons this week. I prefer words, in general – no Wordless Wednesday for me! Also, I’m not a fan of black scratchy pen scrawls in online cartoons. Perhaps it looks better in the paper, which usually pays the bigger cartoonists like Mike Luckovich, so I see why they don’t want to change their style.  But nowadays, most people will see it online.

However, I couldn’t resist this one  of the Pope sweeping the pedophile scandals under the rug! (Why, they look like little children’s heads, disembodied from the horrible rapes from the offending priests… I have a dark soul.) And the Pope is obviously drawn with Uncle Fester of The Addams Family in mind! (from cartoonist Charles Addams, great New Yorker cartoonist.) 

Wordless, and it works, Mike Luckovich of Gocomics.com!

I’m making notes on a couple of the Catholic Church scandal cartoons I’ve come across, as the passivity and negligence and lack of responsibility unfold. (My own cartoon on the priest rapes (Sorry, no link now. Uclick threw away 2 years of my cartoons on Slate, Gocomics and Yahoo News when they kicked me out of Gocomics.) is here.) As of a year or so ago, the population of Los Angleles makes the former minorities (mostly Hispanic) now a majority. So, yeah, Catholicism would be the main religion here. How do they go to church and not ask questions now?!

Here’s a lighthearted cartoon from David Fitzsimmons  of Political Cartoons, about the Supreme Court nominee process.

David Fitzsimmons of politicalcartoons.com

Unlike most of the other cartoons I found, David has made the process into a game of basketball for Obama, and the elephants are part of the game, not the evil enemy. There are some famous basketball games in LA that go on for years! I think it’s mostly people in the industry and scriptwriters. “We’re not just rich cliques, we’re homeboys!”

It’s all a game, people.

I’m a fan of Fitzsimmons for the limited palettes he often uses – that is, limiting the colors in his cartoons to 2 or 3 colors. In this case, it’s a little bit more than 3, but still in the same palette area. The swirls on the wall don’t really make sense, but that’s what makes them fun!

I can only choose 3 cartoons for the Times, but this is a hearty Honorable Mention I wanted to include this week.

Steve Greenberg of politicalcartoons.com

Steve Greenberg is another local cartoonist of Political Cartoons, who lives just outside of Los Angeles, and a friend as well. (He came to my booksigning, didn’t he?!)

I don’t agree with the concept – we all get pollution, rich and poor – but the soft neutral coloring here, even though the cartoon is about toxic chemicals, won my heart! The LA Times deserves the pretty, even though they ignore it in their artwork. And pollution of any kind is something we in California, and in SoCal particularly, can NEVER EVER forget.

Thanks again to all the talented clever cartoonists I was able to include this week, and good luck for next weeks’ picks for the LA Times Opinion section!

Remember, if you want me to consider your work, the guidelines are here. And if one of your cartoons is chosen and you want me to link to your blog or site, just let me know.

My own cartoons this week:

No sex for war - C. Thomas

Comments on Lysistrata here. (Sorry, no link now. )

Dwarves  in a coal mine cartoon. (Sorry, no link now. )

Are really good brownies considered a medical miracle?

Comments on pot brownies here. (No)

Medical Marijuana requires munchies.

Captions for blind Google: The rich get richer, and the poor get their byproducts. Basketball game for the Supreme Court. National Security and nuclear warhead with Obama. The Pope sweeps messy pedophile priests under the rug.

More cartoons:

1. Editorial cartoons for the Los Angeles Times Opinion section.
2. Editorial cartoons for LA Times, April 2010.

And then, it’s been building all week that Tiger Woods had his big announcement coming up. So… like any good cartoonist, I decided on a mashup of sports and an icon of a major religion. I had NO idea that Tiger would mention religion in his speech today…the religion of the Dalai Lama…and that my cartoon would be almost prophetic!!

From CNN:

“People probably don’t realize it,” he said, “but I was raised a Buddhist, and I actively practiced my faith from childhood until I drifted away from it in recent years.”

“I like Buddhism because it’s a whole way of being and living,” Tiger Woods told Sports Illustrated. “It’s based on discipline and respect and personal responsibility.”

Fox News Channel host Brit Hume stirred controversy by publicly advising the golf pro to become a Christian.

Thanks for that little nugget, Brit.

From the LA Times:

As expected, Woods did not reveal when he would return to playing golf, saying he will return to therapy Saturday “for guidance on the issues he is facing.”

Wearing a dark blazer and a blue shirt, Woods often had tears in his eyes during his statement, telling a group of reporters he was responsible for the scandal that has engulfed his family.

UPDATED: 8:47 a.m.: Woods also appeared angry when he asked the media to respect the privacy of his family.

The LA Times cares about your feelings.

(another version of this cartoon after the jump)

In LA for his trip to the US the Dalai Lama was joined by Sheryl Crow.

I do recognize the name of Sheryl Crow.  Apparently, she and the Dalai are “just good friends.” I don’t have a cartoon of Sheryl, but will an artistic image of Sheryl Crow using for commissioning a Genuine Oil Painting of Sheryl Crow in highest professional quality, completely 100% hand-painted by high-skilled oil portrait artist. Art style: art-nouveau do?

I knew the Lama would say something short and sweet for this cartoon, and I am one of the very few (seemingly) who believe Tiger Woods was hung up by his toes for his very personal issues. I hate hate hate what happened to him. I wouldn’t read anything about it. Jimmy Kimmel’s jokes were stupid, and I never laughed. I DON’T CARE WHAT PEOPLE DO IN THE BEDROOM. And who am I to judge his marriage dealie? Maybe they had an open marriage.

And…yes, I was cutting up a banana that was just this edge of bad while the ideas swirled in my head.  I laughed hysterically. And it’s not just what you think, although it is that, too! I mean, bananas go bad faster than any other fruit, and then they’re useless, and they smell bad. Bad bananas.

So the Dalai Lama is the type that won’t judge bananas. Or Tiger. Nor will Slate, and they usually get all my cartoons first.

But newspapers are not like Slate, not yet, so I had to clean it up a little, below

Good thing, because LA Daily News is buying it for Sunday, so you can get your copy there.

There may be more comments on the cartoon here. (Sorry, no link now. Uclick threw away 2 years of my cartoons on Slate, Gocomics and Yahoo News when they kicked me out of Gocomics.)

Cartoon caption: SECRET MEETING – DALAI LAMA AND TIGER WOODS. There are no bad bananas. Alternate ending: Silence is Golden.

More cartoons:

1. Do I have to do a cartoon on GOLF now?
2. I’m the first blogger to write fan fiction about Obama.

The worst part is wondering if someone slashed it – which I have had happen before – and my horror that anyone could be that evil, that malicious, destructive, and just plain awful.

Now, I’m not saying the Pope is evil. I am sure some of his intentions are good, very good. But he certainly comes out with destructive, condemning statements a lot, doesn’t he? No birth control, no condoms, no homosexuality…no money, no health care, no education.

Of course, having less abortions is a worthy goal. But I suspect Obama means less abortions by better birth control, which of course, the Pope ALSO hates.  More kids and more overcrowding, and more of US Catholics, is the papal edict! I am pro-choice, as if that isn’t obvious, and I think the Pope could care less about women, or women’s rights.

I think the cartoon is explanatory, but here I go, anyway: hanging this grotesque poster up, of the Pope with the monster from Alien coming out of his mouth, would be enough to have women go screaming out of the clinic, thus, less abortions. I took great pleasure in researching what the Alien monster really looked like – a fantastic movie. But then I decided he just looked a little…phallic, so I redrew it even scarier, below. Google isn’t always right the first time, btw. More  horrific cartoon after the jump.

Something kind of strange happened while I was coloring this. Do you see that big white splotch above the crucifix? (I’m not Catholic, and this is the first time I ever drew a crucifix.) I don’t know how the white square got there. Yes, it’s like the Virgin Mary on a piece of toast, or in a tree. I mean I’m not the best at Photoshop, but I don’t make mistakes this big or strange. I realized it looked as if there was a window casting light on the cross, which was a nice effect, so I left it.

You know, this is a scary cartoon, even to me.

* Time has a photo essay on Obama meeting the Pope. Aren’t they kind of late on this? Had to take time to get the film developed?

Cartoon caption:”Obama promised the Pope less abortions in the U.S. To help, this poster will be hung in all women’s health clinics. ©D. Barstow, All rights reserved.

More cartoons:

1. Barack Obama has a dream, too.
2. Cartoons on murder, a shark, and an octopus.

"The Three Wise Men All Chip In for a Nice Satellite Dish" ©D.Barstow

“The Three Wise Men All Chip In for a Nice Satellite Dish”

Assignment for Illustration Friday: Wise. (I wasn’t in Slate yet, but could have used this there, too.) Owl? Too obvious. Wise, as in smartass? Too snarky.

So I went with the wisest of the wise, and I’m ready to start Christmas early, too!

Hey, maybe I should make this up as a card for Cafe Press! Or not. I’m loving the colors here. I don’t know whether the clothes are quite correct. Costumers needed on the set!

As far as the right hand on the first wise man, it’s backwards. But that meant good luck in the olden days.

More cartoons:

1. Obama sends a Valentine’s Day Card to the GOP.
2. Halloween party for liberals who worry.