Also, schools will be the first to get hit by radiation, if I remember classroom drills right

nuclear radiation from map of japan falls into school

I think we all knew that the media was exaggerating any danger from radiation. The brave Japanese workers who kept cooling down the factories kept most of the damage under control. (gulp)

People in LA got vaguely more interested in the idea that radiation might sail across the ocean and affect the west coast. Vaguely. But this post in LAist made me laugh out loud! They call Ann Coulter a nuclear physicist, who says radiation is “good for you”.

As people in Japan panic and workers risk their lives at the country’s Fukushima Nuclear Plant, Coulter went ahead and published a column called “A Glowing Report on Radiation.”

Hee! I didn’t read her column, and everyone loves to hate on Ann Coulter, but I met her once, and she was super-nice.

Cartoon caption: Little boy in classroom looks at map of Japan with nuclear radiation falling down from the map, and says, Ms. Figgens, do we have any more of those paper masks?

More cartoons:

1. Japanese Stock Exchange teeters after the earthquake, too.
2. Obama found a horse head in his bed.

From the LA Times:

The Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department took in a record haul of firearms this year through its Gifts for Guns program, an annual event in Compton that allows people to anonymously turn in firearms in exchange for $100 gift cards at Target, Best Buy or Ralphs supermarkets.

Over the last two weekends, deputies collected 965 weapons and distributed more than $95,000 in gift cards, deputies said. That far surpassed last year’s total of 387 guns. Deputies speculate that the shrinking economy may be behind the rise in participation.

In past years, Target and Best Buy cards were the most coveted, Woods said.

But this year, the supermarket cards were the most popular.

Don’t you love the title of this program? Gifts for guns. Like, make this a Christmas, holiday tradition. Or, you could wrap your guns in pretty paper.

Cartoon caption: The Mayor has asked that volunteers turn in all red meat. No questions asked. In other news, the city is offering a barbecue tonight. The poor and omnivorous are invited.

This cartoon has several levels. Obviously, I substituted meat for guns, as meat is always getting a bum rap in health news. (which it deserves, I guess, although I think some people do need meat.) But then there’s the sneak Mayor, trying to get in good with voters by giving it out the other door to the poor. Who cares if they eat meat and die sooner, right?

So…welfare, anyone? Isn’t this how every city works? Take from those who have meat and give it to people who just eat Twinkies.

PS, Remember that Bill Murray movie where the flower lady mournfully wails, turn in your dead? I forget the name.

More cartoons:

1. Who paid for Michael Jackson’s flamboyant funeral?
2. Giving out vaccines for Halloween.

John-Jones nutty putty cave

More than 50 people tried to help him for over a day.

The 6-foot-tall, 190-pound Jones got stuck with his head at an angle below his feet about 9 p.m. Tuesday in an L-shaped area of the cave known as “Bob’s Push.” The area is only about 18 inches wide and 10 inches high.

I literally shuddered at those numbers. Oh my gah. My worst nightmare.

At one point, they had moved him roughly 12 feet out of the tight crevice, far enough to give him some food and water. But he slipped back into the space when an anchor in the cave roof that supported the pulley system failed,

Spencer Jones said his family is “remarkably strong,” but is struggling to make sense of what happened.

I think I know.

I remember reading about a totally different death in the LA Times in 2006 that was disturbing on several counts. A family reported a woman was missing – Mariesa Weber, a 38 year old woman who lived with her mom and sister. Well, that’s strange to begin with. Anyway, from Fox News:

Weber, 38, returned home Oct. 28 and greeted her mother, then wasn’t seen again. Her family thought she had been kidnapped and contacted authorities. Family members scoured her room for clues but found nothing, though they did notice a strange smell.

Her family believes Weber, who was 5-foot-3 and barely 100 pounds, may have fallen headfirst into the space.

On Nov. 9, Weber’s sister went into her bedroom and looked behind a bookcase, where she saw the woman’s foot. Using a flashlight the family saw Weber was wedged upside-down behind the unit.

Um, yeah, I guess. How could someone possibly fall BEHIND a bookcase?

There’s a disgusting description of the girl’s body in St Petersburg Times, of all places!, and many comments from people who were as confused as I was. One comment:

one good thing, they werent looking for a lost wallet or keys

Also, (I crossed out the delicate parts below.)

This is a VERY interesting story. I’m actually glad you published the details (rubbery foot, xxxxx face, mouth open in a xxxxxx, etc) because (unlike everyone else) I’m interested in details. I’m not going to lie and get all “noble” and say it’s bad.

Okay, we won’t call you “noble.”

I still didn’t understand what happened to that woman,  until I did some research. I think it’s positional asphyxia, which occurs when the position of someone’s body prevents them from breathing. Apparently you can’t breathe when you’re upside down for a few hours, although they always hold babies and magicians upside down, so I don’t know. Anyway, poor Mr. Jones was at least at an angle, if not entirely upside down. Maybe it’s your heart or your lungs that can’t work that way.

Here‘s another example: a plumber fell into a manhole head first. It’s really very shocking.

*Oh,  God, horrible update! They are going to close the cave and LEAVE HIS BODY IN THERE. From ABC4:

Utah County Sheriff’s Department says the body of a spelunker who became stuck and died in Nutty Putty Cave will be left there. The cave will also be permanently closed and sealed off.

It’s a state park, which is now closed to everyone! It’s a poor dead lad, and they’ll never know exactly how he died, or give him a funeral! Ugh.

More cartoons:

1. Ted Kennedy and Mary Jo’s purse.
2. Mary Jo and Teddy, sitting in a tree…

Tofu Thanksgiving! With joke in corner, not by Oliphant

Cartoon caption: TOFU FOR THANKSGIVING! Vegan, or…Bankrupt? [Toles or Oliphant would draw a small mammal here]

I wish you could see the family better here…we only get 500 px width on Slate. But it was fun drawing all the food, tiny-like! And I think I made tofu more fun than it has a right to be.

But the part that makes me laugh hysterically – yes I do entertain myself sometimes, which means I have a good job, right? – is the part in the corner about the well-known Pulitzer-prize winning editorial cartoonists Tom Toles and Pat Oliphant, who have  this constant melody of little animals or people or birds saying the punchline in the corner. I’ve seen Mad Magazine and Nickelodeon (now folded) do the same thing…

But what I’m curious about is which of these two op-ed cartoonists did it first; and who’s the copycat? :)

More cartoons:

1. Look how cute the NY Times op-ed is!
2. Editorial cartoons for LA Times, April 2010.

Thanksgiving is only 3 days away! So this is your warning: be sure to eat enough at dinner so you aren’t tempted to bite the other family or guests.

It’s cruel and inhumane.

This blog at Sephora says that monkeys (and people on a limited calorie diet look noticeably younger.

But from a beauty perspective, it does what we want every anti-aging product to do–makes you look younger. Check out the picture of Mike (scroll down in the article), a 36 year old who has been following a caloric restriction diet for 6 years. He’s practically emaciated (6 feet tall and 135 lbs) but he looks like he’s 16! This approach, called caloric restriction, involves eating about 30 percent fewer calories than normal while still getting adequate amounts of vitamins, minerals and other nutrients. According to the Times article, aside from direct genetic manipulation, calorie restriction is the only strategy known to extend life consistently in a variety of animal species.

The original article from 2006 is at the Times:

Recently, the effort has begun to bear fruit, producing a steady stream of studies indicating that the rate of aging is plastic, not fixed, and that it can be manipulated.

Earlier this year, researchers studying dietary effects on humans went so far as to claim that calorie restriction may be more effective than exercise at preventing age-related diseases.

I had read this a couple of years ago. But this was interesting:

Earlier this year, four prominent gerontologists, among them Dr. Miller, published a paper calling for the government to spend $3 billion annually in pursuit of a modest goal: delaying the onset of age-related diseases by seven years.

Guess that never happened.

This couple has been eating less for 16 years, and are staying young.

However, ONLY the LA Times reported that the animals they tested were suffering. (Hey, get a real paper, people.)

“They bit people and were more agitated,” he said. In contrast, the mice who ate a normal diet “would just sit around and let you pick them up.”

I assume that monkeys would be much worse, but of course how would anyone know, since they cage them and probably never ever touch them. If you have any pets, you know how anxious they get at feeding time. Will you still give them food THIS time? Will they survive another day? In starvation mode of 30% less food…well, that is just cruel.

Cartoon Caption: Scientists cruelly gave mice, fish, and now monkeys limited-calorie diets – 30% less food. They are healthier, but bite more. (Unfortunately, no smiley-faces survived.)

This cartoon might be confusing, but I prefer to think of it as a little game. ;) It kind of grew organically – first the information, then the monkey holding on to the title board, and for some reason I threw in smiley-faces, one of which has starved, and turned into The Scream! I don’t know why! It just made me laugh!

More cartoons:

1. Who doesn’t hate AIG?
2. Mickey Mouse as human sacrifice for California budget?

But not with health insurance. It’s like a utility, or going to the dentist, or even car insurance, if you like your car at all. You have to have it, but do you have to feel screwed?

And the whole concept is like a Ponzi scheme: they could never pay out everyone’s claim at one time. They hide how much they make off everyone’s fear – they invest all that money in Swiss banks, I think, so it’s like a river of gold flowing in to them. It’s like imaginary money, and if you didn’t get sick or go to the doc – which is good, if you didn’t – you don’t get rewarded for staying healthy. They take and take and take. Your premiums still go up every farking year, paying for all the losers who have bad genes or don’t take care of themselves. UGH.  

I have Kaiser, which is rated very highly (for an HMO) and yet the things I know about it would make your hair spin. They lie and lie, they ignore health problems, they don’t tell anyone about deals they give low income people, or they do, like this year, and they cancel the plan THE SAME DAY THEY PROMISED IT WOULD START.  They LOST my lab test. I’ll give the details when I’m not so upset.

Who was it who started chatter about the death panels, Sarah Palin? Oh, Sarah. You know I like you. But that…is almost as absurd as this cartoon.

Cartoon caption: “Well, it looks like the public option was killed. Score another for the black-hearted insurance industry.” The vulture: “So long as they don’t lose the death panels.”

Well, I did get to draw a vulture for this cartoon! That’s the silver lining here. The colors came out good, too. And this would fit in just fine in my very special morbid file. Yes, I have one.

More cartoons:

1. I’m the first blogger to write fan fiction about Obama.
2. Who doesn’t hate AIG?

I have the numbers to prove it, but I’m super busy today, so it will have to wait.

escience news says just 40% of public is sure they’ll get the vaccine. Top of the Ticket at LA Times said 38% will get it.

Using an open-ended question, the poll also found the overwhelming reason for rejecting the vaccine this year despite federal warnings and mounting concern about the illness’ seriousness was concern about side effects and disbelief in its safety, especially suspicions that it has been inadequately tested. Other reasons included general ignorance and a belief the illness was probably less serious than the danger of the vaccine.

Then they quote Ron Paul:

Paul says reports of 1,000 U.S. deaths from the H1N1 may be true but….

…come from the same federal government running the vaccine program and remain unverified.

And anyway, the doctor asks, is that really such a “catastrophe” worthy of declaring a national emergency as President Obama did last weekend? The onetime Libertarian says that last winter, 13,000 Americans died from the regular flu, which he says few people mention while approving of a vast new wasteful federal H1N1 program that then fails.

Maybe it takes a scientist to understand clinical trials, but I looked up one of the companies making this vaccine, and they had only 400 tests. Really? Use it on millions after 400 people? But mainly, it’s my own experience with terrible reactions to a vaccine – and I am in perfect health- and the woman on the news, Desiree Jennings, 25, a former cheerleader, who had seizures and seems to be permanently affected.

Ugh, don’t do it.

More cartoons:

1. I like pigs, but not to eat.
2. Paul Conrad, cartoonist extraordinaire, died this week.

Well, the cartoon is about swine flu and Mexico, really, and I concentrated on Mexico, because swine flu in the US looks to be about the size of a head cold. It seems to kill only in Mexico – so far. But I’m not a physician, and am not very interested in disease. However, I couldn’t help but notice in the LA Times a few years ago, how the only incidences of tuberculosis in LA County were from Latino immigrants. The Times is a very liberal paper; it must have just killed them to admit this fact.

Well, anyway, I have to report on the news, not wild hypotheses like 8 kids in NYC had a sniffle. And Mexico has been in the news lately for other sad things, has it not? Think of me as the sundial for cloudy days.

Thanks to Mashable (on Twitter!) I found this article in CNN on
Swine flu creates controversy on Twitter:

Some observers say Twitter — a micro-blogging site where users post 140-character messages — has become a hotbed of unnecessary hype and misinformation about the outbreak, which is thought to have claimed more than 100 lives in Mexico.

For example, some Twitter users told their followers to stop eating pork, he said. Health officials have not advised that precaution.

Etc.

That will be nice, won’t it, when the USDC has some actual facts. Besides calling it H1N1 flu, to try to make it look like they’re working on it.

Okay, let’s go to my mailbag -or hate mail, in this case – OOPS, just got another one. Blanca writes

…..and old problem for Mexico, ignorant americans like you

And Mr. del Rio writes:

Donna, you recent cartoon paints Mexico with a series of “sins” that frankly could apply to practically any other country in the world. Particularly accusing Mexico of “guns” when it is a well known fact that over 90% of all the guns in Mexico come from the US; not to mention that a 40 Billion Dollar drug consumption market is fueling the Mexico cartels. Your depiction of Mexico as bad neighbor is both offensive and ignorant. It must liberating to be able to express so freely and so un-funningly (I thought cartoons were supposed to have at least some element of humor?) your own prejudices on the face of a healthcare crisis that could have emerged from anywhere.

Shame on you!

Oh, and a third:

What do u know about mexico Lady!! U are the bad neighbor!! wee dont need ya at all!!!

(I didn’t have room to add Poor Education in the cartoon.)

None said whether they have a trip planned there soon, or whether they would have written if I had made the map of Canada, instead. Swine flu is not Mexico’s biggest problem – notice that I put it last. And obviously, no one BLAMES a country or a person, for that matter, for getting a disease. But the US has been issuing warnings not to drink the water in Mexico for decades. Maybe, just maybe, their health department, run by the corrupt government there, are not the best.

The Drawing I don’t know if anyone remembers the State Farm jingle that goes, “Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.” Apparently not. Maybe I was trying to be too clever, turning it around like this for the caption.

And this will only be interesting to a small slice of readers, but while I was drawing this I was suddenly remembering an embroidered framed linen that I think my grandmother made in crewel embroidery of Cape Cod, which is somewhat similar in shape. It was done on taupe linen, and I think the wool was only in red and black – so simple and handsome. I think it even had a whale like this! And it had a very fancy compass pointing north that I can’t remember, and didn’t have time to research when I drew this. Yay for embroidered linens.

You can also leave comments anonymously on GoComics for this. Please note that this cartoon was picked as BEST CARTOON OF THE DAY for Slate by the editor – that’s why everyone saw it. So….guess Slate is the r- word, too, eh?

More cartoons:

1. Giving out vaccines for Halloween.
2. Memorial Day cartoon.